The Bus Bench

Sitting in The Middle of 5th Street

Good thing I had my camera to document the foolish position that best describes sitting in the middle of a one-way street facing away from traffic!

-BusTard

Pershing Square: What Was, What IS and what will never be. . .

Being a fan of cartography, typography, illustration and print, I was excited to take some time from my itinerary of fighting, drinking and satire to drink in the Central Library's latest exhibit, L.A. Unfolded: Maps from The Los Angeles Public Library. It is a decent exhibit (the garish lighting against the Plexiglass and protective glass coverings is rather annoying, to state the least) yet one that I highly recommend. The late 19th Century maps on display are small in number but certainly worth the trip; here are a few, after the jump. . .

Another September 11. . .

It is an odd day out there. Still overcast, unlike most every day this year before it.

This morning I exited the Library Tower round 10 a.m. and was struck by the slight resemblance of the Arco Towers (at 5th and Flower Streets) to World Trades 1 and 2 (at Vesey and Church Streets). Shorter, granted, but still a bit like the Plaza near Park Row and the church.

It reminded me of when I was nearly in the pit in lower Manhattan in 2002. I was near where the R at Cortlandt once was. The day before had been a normal Autumn day—as normal as it could be, one day short of what had happened exactly a year earlier. On the 12th, it was again back to "normal.

But in 2002 the 11th was a day of remarkable bluster. The oddly hot winds were kicking up a flurry of dust storms in and round the pit where once stood World Trades 1, 2 and 7. I still maintain that the meteorological event was the direct result of all the anger, confusion, hatred and desperation that was no less palpable a year after the attacks.

At least the stench was gone.

-BusTard

Drunken Goats Storm Bunker Hill

In what appears to be a bi-centennial event, Bunker Hill was once again sheared of its foliage.

Yuppie Metro Tourism #1 -- Barnsdall Park

And so begins a new installment on the Bus Bench. When Browne first asked if I'd be interested in posting here, I warned her that I had a fairly limited perspective. I'm a spoiled Valley dude who doesn't need to ride Metro but does it anyway, and who doesn't rely on it for work (at least not yet). In other words, I'm the douche on the bus typing away on his iPhone, exactly the demographic Metro has been trying to court these last few years with their ad campaigns. She responded, "I want your 23 year old I take transit on the weekend perspective, that's a real perspective."

Well, she asked for it ....

This Week's Triptych—07 March 2008

It is a weird mix, this week's triptych—more weird than what I imagine future ones will be. We shall see.

1. Could this be where reformed taggers retire? Or am I merely desperate to get a laugh?

2. What better to get your girl than candy and condoms while she is waiting on-line for the fabulous burrito and corn chips dinner? Good thing this East L.A. eatery has it all within a few feet of the express bus stop. (If you can name the place, and gimme yer mailing address, I will send you a box of Condom Candy!

 

3. Does this bunny have the measles?  Scroll down for the answer.

I had to pass up loads of lines and just be straight up with this one. No one obvious quip would have done: "They really DO get it for the articles!" "How big are the bumps in the photos?" "How can blind folk possibly masturbate if they are reading with their fingers?" and so on.
Yes, I am a sad little man. . .

-BusTard

This Week's Triptych

I frequently come across odd things that do not so much deserve much more than a smart-arsed comment in passing, and so I tend to pass on recording them.

Earlier this week, while walking along Wilshire from LaBrea to Western, I conceived the idea to do something with these otherwise unremarkable moments: "This Week's Triptych." I do not know if I will always have one each week—I promise not to do it just to do it, but to offer something worth at least a second glance.

Here is the first one. Enjoy!

 

-BusTard

Caravan Books

Caravan Books, a book store I have patronised for some 11 years now, is a book shoppe that is on the required reading list for those recently removed from the West side and Valley to downtown. (And yes, by this I mean those folk looking to cash in on telling their friends how they live in downtown—oh, so dangerous!—even as they actively pursue changing it into the car-crammed, chain store-laden, flavourless middle class mecca of the places from which they emigrated.)

But enough of my kvetching (for now).

Caravan is one of the two booksellers to go to get great books as well as rare and odd titles on the history of Los Angeles. (The other is El Pueblo Gallery over on East Olvera; more about that in a later post.) For those of you wondering how downtown Los Angeles used to be before Bunker Hill was raised, before Dodger Stadium—or even the Dodgers—existed in L.A. or why the freeways and other major thoroughfares were laid out as they are, this is a damn good place to start.

550 South Grand Avenue (btw 5th and 6th Streets)
Los Angeles, CA 90071-2602
213.626.9944

 

-BusTard

A Moveable Bench

My apologies to that glorified fisherman, Hemingway, for the pinched title.

This continues to be such a travesty that I just had to prove how an impromptu move or two might occur within a few seconds. (In the central "city," where the top speed is somewhere between stop and glacial, I can only imagine the havoc what could be wrecked were a madman to take the perpetually unbolted bus bench at 5th and Hill out to do true damage. . . )

 

MoveableBench

     

-BusTard

 

The Continuing Saga of the Ever-broken APT on 5th and Hill

The Automatic Pay Toilet on 4th and Hill remains closed. No LCD panel, no news, no nothing. What the hell is going on with the assholes who are supposed to get this over-priced hunk of green metal going?


Round the corner at 5th and Hill, the APT was again out of service:

APTbrokent5thHill08Dec2007
Video sent by shametrainla

The APT at 6th and Main was working, as was the one outside the URM on San Pedro. (The latter is never not working, as the mission probably keeps a close eye on it.)

Yes, I am obsessed with the maintenance of these things, as should be our negligent "city."

-BusTard