Black Monday prompts Blue Metro

As there is neither a recession nor a depression, then it follows that tits and ass, drugs and death, wrong and right, AIN'T. Or so Metro implies, as this single slice of the debauchery to follow clearly illustrates:

Those asses are ready for action, eh? Feet in the air, water hoses waiting to fertilise the figurative lawn, the calming green waft of sensimilla wafting through the air. But hey—these were merely mental images of blue that Metro provided to the public. I am just a hack whose rudimentary descriptions of these invigorating images are below par. I did not hire nor conceive the stories to be told on TV, nor edit the scripts, nor hire the actors, nor design the illustrations, nor bribe Metro, nor produce the wraps, nor, well, you get the picture.

But do not get me wrong. I love fucking as well as too many unmentionable stripes of sex and debauchery than can be appreciated openly—I wish I could have kept it secret but there was too much published about it in sundry periodicals long before I elected to get olde, to be serious, to write as an advocate for a town desperately seeking its city-zenship. What sickens me is hypocrisy, and lies that need not be told, and money that is stolen and thereafter poorly spent. As I take Metro daily, I have to cover my mouth so as not to vomit from the stench of bullshit, and keep my other hand in check lest it stray in the company of the schmucks who run Metro.

"What the hell do you mean, ya cranky ol' bastard?" you may well ask. Here are several thousand words:

 

Summer of 2008 got us ready for what was to cum despite Metro's parental-flavoured advertising guidelines about morality. Even as Showtime was allowed to blatantly advertise on the outward sides of Metro buses wraps screaming about the titillating tales of well-paid prostitutes ("Secret Diary of A Call Girl") and illicit drug use ("Weeds"), one aspect remain unclear to the public despite being clearly stated on Metro's Web site as well as, essentially, by law:

"Advertising may not be displayed if it’s content:

    * Promotes or relates to an illegal activity;
    * Contains language which is obscene, vulgar, profane or scatological;
    * Contains images, copy or concepts that actively denigrate a specific ethnic or gender group;
    * Contains images, copy or concepts that actively denigrate public transportation; or
    * Contains obscene matter as defined in the Los Angeles County Code, Chapter 13.17, Section 13.17.010, or sexually explicit material as defined in the Los Angeles County Code, Chapter 8.28, Section 8.28.010D."

I am not gonna waste my time wading through the semantics of L.A. county code crap owing to the the first of the five no-nos: "Promotes or relates to an illegal activity." Last I heard, the exchange of sex for money was illegal. As for sensimilla (do not get me started about Hearst, 1936-37, "pot," paper pulp and hemp paper unless you have a background in printing, substrate, newspaper and book-bindery; I will tear you a new hole if you attempt to approach this topic with the perspective of a naught more than being law enforcement officer or mere military), I understand it may as well be illegal.

But enough of that. Murder is and has been illegal—well before even Hamurabi saw to his Babylonian slave-scribes chiseling it into a nine-foot statue. As Metro is now taking on a glorification in defiance of its own code, one wonders if Showtime's fans of such social expression should be equally exempt should they express unto Roger, Tony, Pam, Tom, in regards their agency's demand: "Do not in any way disrespect or call into question the credibility of any MTA employee." Are you kidding me? Fuck you, Roger, Tony, Pam, Tom and the rest of you. But I suppose that is out of line, whereas the entertainment-based promotion of murder, prostitution and illicit drug use is OK.

Then again, what do we expect from a mayor whose little dick drives him to screw that which is a better trophy than his wife, then cast the catch meant for a quick meal back into the sea when the department of Fishin' Game catch him with that out-of-season snapper in his grip?

-BusTard