How to ride the bus to South Central.

Every time people bring up South LA or as I call South Central it’s always some miserable slice of life that’s brought up.

I was just reading in the LA Times how kids in South LA are depressed. In the homicide blog I read how people get shot on a regular basis. On LAist on the neighborhood project the editors couldn’t even be bothered to get out of their moving vehicles to take pictures of the graffiti.

But South Central isn’t actually horrible. There are some horrible aspects, but South Central isn’t horrible 24/7 or even 12/4.

South Central is quite entertaining.

And as a woman of African descent in LA in order to have your hair not look as if you’re insane, you’re eventually going to have to go to South Central. Regardless of how loaded you get, how far you move away, even if your husband is a Dutch national and your kids are blond, eventually you’re going to have to visit the vicinity of South Central to get hair supplies.

I’ve got dreads.  They used to be more organic looking, but my best friend Sean (who is a girl) was like, “I think making your hair normal is a priority.”

She’s like a blond Jackie O. She didn’t mean my hair wasn’t normal, because it wasn’t like hers, but it wasn’t normal, because she knew black girl natural hair could look cute.  She knew it didn’t have to look DIY insane.

“Browne, I saw this picture of Erykah Badu, maybe you could do this?” Sean.

I guess it’s obvious I needed help if my English-Irish best friend was going through Jet Magazine picking out hairstyles for me, besides my wedding is in June.

Anyways the other day I got my dreads all cute black chicked out, by this insane black chick who looked oddly a lot like me, but with big boobies (so freakin’ unfair, I would look good with big boobs,) but apparently “black chick” dreads require maintenance, unlike my DIY dreads which required me to just get up in the morning.

Fudge, so I had to make an effort. I had to go to South Central to get hair supplies.

So I hop on a MTA bus from downtown LA to South Central.

The trip started out great.

“The dreadlock queen does not pay,” MTA driver.

“Oh here’s my dollar,” me because I wasn’t sure if he was serious.

MTA driver then blocked the fare box and gave me a free day pass.

Awesome, Sean was right. This was a great idea. I’m already saving money owing to my new cool “I give a shit black girl” dreads.

Anyways the bus journey started out normal, then around Leimert Park I spotted the most adorable thing.

I spotted dude riding his bike with his three little girls on one of those connected type bicycles.

It was adorable.

I wish I had my camera to capture this African-American guy in South LA with his kids riding up King Blvd.

I quickly got snapped out of cool hippie world by the other passengers.

They were freakin’ the fuck out.

“Oh lord he’s going to kill those babies,” said and older African-American woman passenger.

“There’s a place for that, it’s the beach,” said a younger Puerto Rican New Yorker out here to visit her boyfriend.

Bus driver dude even got along side family bike guy, “Brother, you need to be careful. You got some beautiful children. Get on the sidewalk. I see you, but other people aren’t going to care.”

Bike guy didn’t care. He kept riding. I could tell he knew what he was doing, but on the bus the people were just like, “Oh my GOD!!” “Oh Lord!!!”

Old women were praying, old men were giving commentary, and the young people were creating colorful expletives.

I finally got to my destination after my Spike Lee experience on the MTA bus to South Central.

I’ve seen the bike story play out on the bus a lot, but never with the concern that was on that bus. And never with lively play by play commentary.

South Central can have it’s bad moments, but in general it’s pretty damn entertaining. It's also pretty much the only place in Los Angeles were you can get the tools to be cute black chick (wait i mean cute black chick that showers, cause i was cute before just sort crustie looking), which is good for weddings, job interviews, and business loans.

by Browne Molyneux

Comments

[Don]

Actually the Pico/La Cienega area seems to be a hotspot of African-American hair care. There are piles and piles of hair salons in the area, and except for the Jewish barber shop just west of Robertson or the Mexican barber shop all the way down by 18th street, they seem to all be patronized exclusively by African Americans.

[rogedog92]

Hey Browne.... just out of curiosity which bus line was this??

[Browne]

"the Pico/La Cienega" Don

If you look on a map to me in my opinion the Pico/La Cienega area is right on the NW tip of south central, so I'm saved my using vicinity ;)

browne

[browne]

The bus line was the 40. Didn't want to put it in the post since you know don't know who is reading this and didn't want busdriver to get busted.

Aren't I considerate?

Browne

[rogedog92]

lol. Indeed you are considerate. See and some people think you're mean.

[browne]

To me I'm not out to fuck with the little guy. I'll never post anything on a driver to get him or her fired. I'll make fun of them, but as far as getting working class people fired, that's pretty fucked up.

I know that when METRO does have issues it's from the top. To me I aim at the big guys, Roger Snoble, Pam, Villaraigosa, Jan Perry, Bush, Arnold...that's who it's fun to mess with.

Online I am an asshole, but seriously it's not personal and if you heard me in person some of the things that read super mean, you would probably think are actually funny.

I like discourse. I hate the fact that the internet has become this big pr machine. No one criticized or puts out true editorial work.

The difference between me and other people who are kind of known on the internet is that I don't have the added burden of actually being friends with people. I actively try to not meet other bloggers, because I want to stay real and not some bullshit.

Not everyone is bullshit, but you know I don't want to become that. It would be redundant.

I'm the working class man (and woman) friends.

Browne

[chimatli]

cool story!

[Lani]

Where'd you get the dreads touched up? I'm looking to do something similar.

[Browne]

Lani,

My hair needed more a touch up it required surgery...lol...a good place for touch ups is Oh My Nappy Hair. It's also a good place for just getting connections in the African-American community in LA.

(I assume you're not from here, because if you were you would already know.)

http://www.ohmynappyhair.com/preview/index.html

I will email you offline my hairdressers info, if you need serious help. She isn't online, even though I've tried to get her online. She's pretty awesome.

Thanks for posting.

Browne